Sometimes, God throws us a curve, and we find ourselves trying to hold onto our faith in the dark. My husband, Harry, and I had served churches in the US for over thirty-five years when an international congregation in Hong Kong contacted him about becoming their pastor. Though I wanted to remain in the States, what if their invitation came from God? We visited and looked over the city in early November, and our questions exploded. For example, how could we live across the ocean and stay connected to our family? How could we make a Christ-difference in a culture so unlike our own?

Despite our uncertainty, the Pastor Search Committee invited us to return so Harry could preach a trial sermon. We hesitated, unwilling to agree unless we sensed God’s undeniable call. We promised to pray and give them an answer after Thanksgiving. Then we flew home, holding onto our faith in the dark and believing God would answer.

Can you identify? You want to follow God’s direction if only you can discern his will. Harry and I prayed, studied Scripture, and listened to sermons. Godly counselors offered diverse opinions, but we heard nothing from the Lord. Our hearts yearned for him to dispel the darkness and light our way, yet Thanksgiving came and went amid his silence. With a heavy heart, Harry called the committee chairman to tell him we remained clueless about God’s will. Although we wanted to say yes, we couldn’t move to Hong Kong without a firm conviction of his call. Disappointed, the chair left the door open for us to come if God spoke.

Like us, Joseph was in the dark about his future. Life had taken an unexpected turn. What did God want from him?

Daylight to Dark ~ What to Do

Despite Joseph’s eager anticipation and months-long preparation for his upcoming wedding, his discovery of Mary’s condition plunged him into darkness and left him no choice. As much as he wished to believe her story about an angelic encounter, he couldn’t. Since he was a righteous man, to maintain his honor meant he had no option but to divorce his pregnant fiancée. To do otherwise would appear to condone her presumed adultery. The only question was whether to pursue a public or private end to their betrothal and marriage. 

Joseph longed to mirror God’s righteous justice and mercy. Perhaps Mary deserved censure, yet a public divorce would guarantee community disgrace and possible stoning. Or he could divorce her privately, sparing her humiliation in court. Granted, the gossip mill would flourish, but she would live. Joseph’s heart broke as he grieved the pain Mary would suffer and the devastating loss of his hopes for their life together. What should he do? How could he hold onto his faith in the dark?

A Dream in the Night

God sent Joseph a dream with an angel and an alternative: “Do not be afraid to take Mary home as your wife, because what is conceived in her is from the Holy Spirit” (Matthew 1:20 NIV). Joseph’s heart soared when he realized his bride told the truth, but it sank when he recognized the cost of obedience. If he followed God’s directions, he would share Mary’s shame, sacrificing his honor, his most valuable possession. He and Mary would be the talk of the town.

Nevertheless, Joseph obeyed even though the responsibility of parenting such a unique child weighed heavy on his heart. He was a carpenter, not a religious scholar. Yet he realized God had also chosen him when he chose Mary. Confident in the Lord’s sustaining grace, Joseph stepped into the darkness of the unknown and trusted God to light the way.

Are You Holding onto Faith in the Dark?

What are you waiting for? Where are you struggling to hold onto your faith in the dark? God sometimes allows darkness to surround us as we wait because trusting him with the unknown stretches our faith. How should we respond? Please share your thoughts with your fellow strugglers. I’d love to pray with and for you. You can use the Comments box below.

The Rest of the Story

Holding onto Faith in the Dark (Part 2) will detail the rest of Joseph’s and our stories and how God spoke to all of us. Subscribe to my email list to receive a notification when the blog is posted. I hope to see you there!

Holding onto Faith in the Dark (Part 1) by @NLucenay on Beyond the Front Door Share on X