Honor: What Everybody Wants

What is the one thing everybody wants? In the West, we call it prestige, recognition, significance, respect, admiration, or esteem. In the rest of the world, people call it honor. Whatever you call it, longing for honor is universal. But who we want it for and how we get it depends on our culture.

The Legend behind the Dragon Boat Festival

For weeks, teams in Hong Kong have been preparing for the annual Dragon Boat Festival. The festival celebrates the memory of a Chinese official who drowned himself over 2,000 years ago to protest government corruption. Tradition says people tried to rescue him, beating drums to scare away whatever might harm him. When they were unsuccessful, they threw dumplings into the river to appease the hungry fish and to calm the man’s spirit. Today, people eat rice and meat dumplings wrapped in bamboo leaves and take part in dragon boat races to commemorate his sacrifice. Since so many groups want to take part, a lottery determines boat entrants. Each dragon boat team includes 20 paddlers plus a steerer and a drummer. Victory requires timing and teamwork.

Seeking Honor

There are two motivations for seeking honor and two sources of honor. You can seek it for yourself or for your group. You can receive honor because of your achievements or because of your relationships. Whether individualist or collectivist, culture affects both the motivation and the source of honor.

Two Motivations for Seeking Honor

Games such as football, basketball, and baseball illustrate the primary motivation people have for seeking honor in individualist cultures. The team must work together but often depends on individual stars to lead them to victory. Personal honor comes from a person’s achievement.

In an individualist culture, people seek honor for themselves—to score the most points, win the coveted promotion, score the highest grade, make it to the top of their field. We take credit for our accomplishments and feel good about ourselves because of our achievements. Consider how much time we in the West spend in reputation management, in making sure people notice our success.

Dragon boat racing is a picture of the dominant motivation people have for seeking honor in collectivist cultures. There are no superstars; the goal isn’t to gain fame for oneself but the team. Individual honor results from team honor. Success depends on how well the team works together.

In a collectivist culture, people seek honor for their group—the team, family, village, or country. Both honor and shame are corporate; the honor or shame of one affects everyone in the group. Group honor comes when a group member meets the group’s expectations. Likewise, group shame occurs when a group member fails to meet group expectations. What is true for one is true for all. Rather than being “all about me,” it’s “all about us.”

Are Corporate Honor and Shame Fair?

Although Western Christians may struggle with the fairness of the idea that the group suffers for the actions of one, we find the concept in Scripture.

For if, by the trespass of the one man, death reigned through that one man, how much more will those who receive God’s abundant provision of grace and of the gift of righteousness reign in life through the one man, Jesus Christ!

Romans 5:17

Christians in individualist cultures accept that when one sinned (Adam), all sinned, and when one died and came back to life (Jesus), one made it possible for all to live.

Two Sources of Honor

Achieved honor, which is earned by accomplishments, is the most desired type of honor in the West. We praise people because of what they have done. We assume people hold the jobs they do because of their merit, and we dismiss those we feel are in an esteemed position because of their connections. The “self-made man” is an icon of the West.

Individualist cultures dominate in about 30% of the world, collectivist cultures in about 70%. Ascribed honor, which comes from family or relationships, is most coveted in collectivist cultures. In those cultures, a person’s honor begins with his ancestry, which explains why Asians worship their ancestors. It also clarifies why last names are first in Asian cultures and why genealogies are important in the Bible. Whether positive or negative, ancestors affect a person’s face (how others see you). Knowing or being related to people in power is prestigious. Who you know is more important than what you know.

Regardless of culture, honor is always a public commodity; it must come from others. Both honor and shame affect our face, which is always public. Even if we stretch to earn reocgnition for our accomplishments, other people must give it. We see ourselves as we imagine others see us.

Should Christians Seek Honor?

Are Christians dishonoring God when they seek honor? As Jesus pointed out to his disciples, the problem isn’t that we seek honor; it’s that we seek it from men instead of God. He condemned the Pharisees since “they loved the glory that comes from man more than the glory that comes from God.” (John 12:43)

Consider Abraham

(I realize the following verses come before God changed Abram’s name to Abraham. But since people are more familiar with his changed name, I’ll use that.) Why did Abraham listen to and obey a God he barely knew (if he knew him at all)? God asked Abraham to leave his sources of wealth and honor (father, people, and country). What did God offer that convinced Abraham to obey?

I will make you into a great nation,
    and I will bless you;
I will make your name great,
    and you will be a blessing.

Genesis 12:2

In Abraham’s culture, the highest goal was to have numerous descendants. God promised him so many descendants that they would become a nation. He also promised him divine favor plus fame and prestige. Abraham’s blessings would be so great he would be a blessing to others.

I will bless those who bless you,
    and whoever curses you I will curse;
and all peoples on earth
    will be blessed through you.

Genesis 12:3

God ensured Abraham’s favor in the community and promised to protect his reputation. Once again, God assured Abraham of a place of honor, as blessings would flow through him.

“To your offspring I will give this land.” (Genesis 12:7) Furthermore, God pledged to give Abraham wealth and security. God’s promise to Abraham was for incredible honor, the kind only God can supply.

Consider the Followers of Jesus

Through belief in Jesus, people can become part of God’s family.

Yet to all who did receive him, to those who believed in his name, he gave the right to become children of God.

John 1:12

A person could gain great honor by being adopted into a high-status family… To be born into or adopted into the true God’s family, and named as an heir of the true God… was the highest honor status imaginable.

Andrew Bartlett, QC of Crown Office Chambers, London

Jesus didn’t condemn seeking greatness, but he turned it upside down.

You know that those who are regarded as rulers of the Gentiles lord it over them, and their high officials exercise authority over them. Not so with you. Instead, whoever wants to become great among you must be your servant, and whoever wants to be first must be slave of all. For even the Son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve, and to give his life as a ransom for many.

Mark 10:42-45

Our desire for honor is from God, but human sources never lead to permanent satisfaction. Neither achieved nor ascribed honor can deliver lasting fulfillment. Only God can provide heart-satisfying honor. He gives it to those who join his family through believing and following his Son. What would change in our world if as children of God we translated our belief into God-honoring lives of service to others?