Kneeling in the prickly grass behind the parsonage, I separated the blades, trying to see what I’d lost. The previous night I was chatting with a neighbor when I grabbed my eye. A speck of dust creates agony when it lodges between your eyeball and your contact lens. As Eve ignored danger, I also did and popped out the contact just as a breeze blew. I couldn’t stay to search since it was time for church; so, off I went half-blind.

The next morning, I headed outside with a prayer. Lord, I know you can see all; please show me where to look. Open my eyes; help me see. I was young, pregnant, and trying to stretch money to impossible lengths. Replacing a lost contact wasn’t in the budget. After searching until my eyes crossed, I spied a shiny piece of plastic. Success! I found what I’d lost.

Everyone knows the pain of losing something valuable. What did Adam and Eve lose in the Garden? In addition to losing intimate fellowship with God, Adam and Eve lost the spirit of cooperation they’d shared. They became competitors rather than companions.

Today the concept of partnership dissolves in the push for dominance—not only in marriage but in all relationships. Have we lost who and what God created us to be? Let’s look back at Eve, not in her worst moment (Genesis 3), but as God created her.

Eve: Created in God’s Image

God created mankind (Hebrew: adam) in his own image, in the image of God he created them; male and female he created them.

Genesis 1:27

Two third-century rabbis interpreted these words to mean God created the first human with two faces and no back. When God later took one of the man’s ribs (literally: sides, Genesis 2:21), he separated the front side from the back side, making what we call male and female. Reflecting God’s image requires both male and female working together.

In Genesis 1:28, God gave Adam and Eve a mandate to create a culture that honored him. They were to:

• Reflect God’s image
• Reproduce physically and spiritually
• Rule creation as God’s representatives

Imagine hearing this story for the first time. You live in a collectivist, honor/shame culture in which gaining honor is your highest goal. What greater honor could you have than being an image-bearer of the Creator God? Since your relationships define your identity, what could be more honorable than being part of God’s family?

Eve: A Suitable Helper

Genesis 2 includes more information about Eve’s creation:

The Lord God said, “It is not good for the man [adam] to be alone. I will make a helper [ezer] suitable [kenegdo] for him.”

Genesis 2:18

Ezer comes from two roots: power and strength. Nineteen times in the Old Testament, ezer refers to God as Israel’s helper. As Elise Crapuchettes, author of Popes and Feminists, observed, “How could this help be a milquetoast, weak, insipid help? God himself is providing it.” In Eve, God supplied Adam with divine help so together, they could accomplish the mandate.

Kenegdo means “like what is in front of him.” Although different, Adam and Eve are equal. But after the Fall (Genesis 3), control and power became issues, and honor competition began because with honor comes power. The struggle started for them and continues for their descendants.

3 Steps to Recover What We Lost

The battle for power and control colors every relationship. God desires restored relationships for us—both with him and with one another. Jesus came to reconcile us to God and to empower us to recapture the unity that permeated the Garden before the Fall. How? Jesus-followers have access to the answer:

• Recognize genuine honor comes from God—not from what we have accomplished (achieved honor) but from our relationship with his Son (ascribed honor)
• Refuse to play humanity’s honor games
• Resolve to build God’s kingdom, not our own

Only God can give heart-satisfying honor. As we “submit to one another out of reverence for Christ” (Ephesians 5:21), we can reclaim what we’ve lost. We’ll discover the joy and peace of being who God created us to be so we can do what he called us to do. How do your relationships reflect God’s image?